God was sparing David from having any hand in the deaths of those he loved: Jonathan, his brothers, and even Saul, whom David loved in spite of all that Saul had done to him. David could have persisted in wanting to fight for the Philistines, but instead he went back where there were other battles to be fought. In going back, David was able to save his family and the families of his army who had been carried away by the Amalekites. If David had gone with the Philistines, he would have lost his entire family in addition to Saul and Jonathan.
How often does God spare us? There is so much pain that we will suffer in our lifetime. It is inevitable. But pain that would be impossible to bear? Perhaps that is what God was sparing David from. Would the grief have been unbearable if both his family and Saul's family perished? God knew. He is all wise and all knowing. In less than the blink of an eye, God knows all the outcomes and all the repercussions of our choices. From the day we are born, he sees our life unfolding. He knows the choices we will be offered and the decisions we will make. For every temptation the enemy lays before us, he provides an alternative.
There hath no temptation taken you but such as is common to man: but God is faithful, who will not suffer you to be tempted above that ye are able; but will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that ye may be able to bear it. - 1 Cor. 10:13 KJV
2010 Post - 1 Samuel 26-31: The End of the Line
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